“So I was at the flea market, you know the one out on highway 25, and I found this little table off in the corner, covered with all this weird stuff that was being sold by this old Chinese guy and …”
“Terry, what the hell did you buy now? I swear, winning that cash has been the worst thing for you.”
“What? Why would you say that? I got the new truck, and some other stuff.”
“Yeah, let’s look at that other stuff, Terry. You got the lottery ticket bronzed. Bronzed. It’s not like the text is visible anymore. It just looks like a bronze rectangle on a wood base.”
“OK, that was probably not a good idea, but …”
“You got a water bed.”
“Hey! There is nothing wrong with a water bed!”
“And you filled it with Jello, Terry. Not exactly a water bed now. God forbid it spring a leak.”
“Well, it kinda did. The cat jumped up and tried to sharpen its claws and …”
“Ah, the ‘cat’. It is a freaking puma, Terry. A puma! You have a wild cat living in your house. I’m kinda expecting to find you half eaten one of these days.”
“Tigger is alright. He wouldn’t harm a fly. Well, he would, but he wouldn’t hurt me.”
“Right, because he’s such a smart animal. Whatever. It’s still a wild animal, Terry. And then there was the 55 gallon drum of nutella. I don’t even want to know what that was all about.”
“Nutella is good stuff.”
“On toast, sure. It does not explain how a good portion of it ended up on the walls of your living room. And no, I really do not want an explanation. The point is, you have been spending your new found wealth on the stupidest things and I can only imagine what you spent money on at the flea market.”
“Oh, it’s nothing. Just this.”
“Hmmm. OK, it looks interesting. I mean it’s been years since I myself have owned any marbles, but that is an interesting looking one. How much did you spend on it?”
“$3,000.”
“WHAT?!?”
“It’s not just a marble, Ralph! It holds the essence of Emperor Wang Chung of the Dim Sum era in…”
“Wang Chung? Dim Sum? Really?”
“Yeah! He was the Emperor of …”
“Dim Sum is a variety of tasty dumpling and other small portion foods, not an era in Chinese history. And Wang Chung was a 1980’s rock band, Terry.”
“He was?”
“Terry, you are such an idiot.”