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Riff 030116

image: Pear Slices © Suto Norbert | Dreamstime Stock Photos
image: Pear Slices © Suto Norbert | Dreamstime Stock Photos

“Craziest damn thing I ever seen.”

George walked into the bar, the patrons all gathered around an older man who was holding his drink in both his trembling hands.

“What’s crazy?”

“This guy’s telling us what he just saw out in the desert. Sounds a bit too much like a tall tale to me.”, said the bartender.

“Ain’t no tall tale, ‘s the damned truth! I ain’t never gonna ferget it in all my days!”

George pulled up a stool at the bar next to the old man and ordered drink for both of them.

Curiosity had a way of digging its claws into George. Always had. And it usually got him into all sorts of trouble by having heim be exactly where he was not supposed to be.

“Obliged.”, said the old man as his drink was placed on the bar in front of him.

“So what was it you saw, mister?”

“I’ve been livin’ in this desert my whole dang life and I ain’t never seen the like. It was a coyote, runnin’ around on its back legs! Fool thing was runnin’ around, tryin’ t’catch whatever it could. Could tell it were hungry by how skinny it was. Hunger must’ve made it stupid too.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, it caught scent of this bird what started to scramble away from it and it started chasin’ it, running on its goldurned hind legs! Ain’t never gonna catch a bird like that.”

“And that’s why you think it was stupid?”

“Nah! It put up a good chase, better’n I thought it would. Bird kickin’ up a mighty fine cloud of dust with it ziggin’ and zaggin’. Fool coyote never even saw the cliff. Ran right off the edge.”

“That’d definitely be a sight, but I don’t think …”

“Damn thing climbed back up the cliff! I swear it even dusted itself off! Then went right back to tryin’ t’catch that bird. Thought he had him too, ’til the bird cut a sharp corner right along ol’ Willits’ fence line. Fool coyote run straight through that barbed wire!”

“Ew … got cut up bad did it?”

“Got sliced into four pieces! It just sorta stopped and stood there a sec and it sorta slid apart.”

The patrons around the old man gasped.

“That ain’t the worst of it! It picked up its own pieces and put itself back together!!”

The old man finished off the drink George had bought him in a single swallow. George was about to call out the codger for spinning a yarn when the door to the bar opened and in walked a coyote.

“Evening, my good barkeep, a strong libation if you would be so kind. I have had a particularly trying day.”

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